Let's be honest here, dudes. We're completely screwing things up/over/to hell. Look around. Our brains/lives/relationships are a goddamn mess/disaster/train wreck. We spend our money on useless crap. Our goals/dreams/aspirations are gathering dust like that ancient cereal in the back of your pantry/pair of shoes you haven't worn since high school/guitar you swore you'd learn to play. We're lost.

Maybe it's time we tried harder/faced facts/admitted defeat and actually did something about it?

“2. Meant to Be Fucked by You, Guys”

You guys have about this, right? This is the real deal, the kind of action that gets your blood pumping. No time for weaklings here, only those who want it all. We're talking about getting dirty and feeling every fiber of the experience.

• Ignore that boring stuff you’ve been seeing.
• That where the real fun is.
• Take what you deserve: a wild, screaming night.

It's not demanding. We’re just saying you the reality.

dudes: Please Get down with me This chick Right Now

Look, I'm not Playing. I'm feeling it right now and I need some Satisfaction. Don't Delay around with Small talk, just Make love to me already. I'm Wet and waiting for you to Show me what you got.

Don't be a chicken, I know you want to.

Help! These Guys {Want to Fuck Me|Are Trying To Get In My Pants

I mean, come on! It's like they can't Read a Room. I've been trying to Send Signals, but they just {Keep Coming Back|Won't Leave Me Alone . It's getting {ReallyAnnoying.

• Perhaps It's Time I Call the Police.
• Dude, Please| This is getting Out of Hand.

Honestly, I just want to Live My Life in Peace! Is that too much to ask?

Bro's crank Fucking Insane

Tonight, we're gonna blow the roof off. I'm talking about a night you won't forget. We gotta raise hell and let loose. I've got {a playlist on fire|epic beats that will make you lose your mind.

We're hitting the dance floor all night long. So, are you ready to get down??

Let's make this a night to remember.

Damn It, I'm Calling the Guys

Sometimes, life/shit/problems just gets too much/out of hand/stupid. You're tired/pissed off/done and the Fuck me guys only solution is to hang out with your friends/grab some beers/get wasted. It doesn't matter what you're doing/working on/feeling. Just grab your phone and call up the bros/boys/crew. They'll understand/be there for you/probably judge you no matter what.

• It's a rite of passage/guy thing/solid plan
• A few drinks will clear things up.
• They'll probably tell you to chill out/make fun of your situation/suggest a wild plan.